Bag It.

Has it become standard procedure for the cashier/check out person at the store to NOT hand you your bags when you complete a purchase? Seriously... this seems to be happening more and more often lately.

I first noticed it a while back, on one of our rare trips to WalMart. We went through the checkout, paid for our purchases, and the cashier didn't bother to hand us our bags. We had to spin the little bag thingy around and get them ourselves. I just figured, "Well, that's what I get for shopping at WalMart." (Have I told y'all how much I hate WalMart?? We'll occasionally venture into the new one near us, but mostly only because they carry the brand and flavor of yogurt Mr. RM likes.)

Then it happened at Publix once or twice. On one such occasion, there was even a cashier AND a bagboy, and neither bothered to hand me my bags. They just stood there jibber jabbering with one another while I had to reach over the bag stand to get my bags.

Yesterday, it happened at Target. And not only did the young man not hand me my bags, he proceeded to start ringing up the customer behind me before I could finish gathering my bags myself! What kind of freakin' customer service is THAT?? I'm generally friendly and nice to store staff members, so it's not like they're doing it because I've pissed 'em off. What's the deal?

I know... it sounds like a trivial point. Yes, I'm perfectly capable of picking up my own bags, but it's often a bit awkward trying to wrangle them from the customer side of the checkout counter. Plus, I just think it's kind of rude for the cashier not to at least assist with the bags. It's just plain poor customer service. Or maybe it's just me.

It's Bodhi Day

Image borrowed from the internet.

Today, Buddhists around the world are celebrating Bodhi Day. For many Buddhists, December 8th is recognized as the day that Siddhartha Guatama, after fasting and meditating beneath the Bodhi tree for 49 days, attained enlightenment and became the Buddha.

I'm not Buddhist, I'm more of a confused Taoist with Buddhist leanings, but I really like (and try to follow) a lot of the principles that Buddhism teaches. That's why I enjoy recognizing Bodhi Day as a way to honor those principles. And so I had a breakfast of rice and milk this morning, which legend says is the first meal the Buddha had upon his awakening. (Although I put a little cinnamon and sugar in mine.)

I'll also decorate my "Bodhi" tree tonight. Sure, it's really just a silk ficus tree, but it happily holds a string of colored lights (to represent the many pathways to enlightenment), a few strands of colored beads (to represent how all things are connected) and three shiny ornaments (to represent the Three Jewels of Buddhism: the Buddha, the Dharma and the Sangha). I'll also string some colored lights around my front door. And I'll try to remember to turn on the lights, and light a candle as well, for the next 30 days.

His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama

I'll also try to remember to practice the kind of mindfulness that Buddhism teaches. Hopefully, I can keep carrying that throughout the year.

By the way, did you know that the Dalai Lama has his own Facebook page? I don't know if it's REALLY his page, but it wouldn't surprise me. He's such a cool guy! No, seriously... this dude is made of awesome. He's funny, smart, well grounded and has some solid ideas on how people should live and behave. Who wouldn't want to friend him? His page ALMOST makes me want to reconsider my steadfast avoidance of Facebook.

If you'd like to learn more about how to celebrate Bodhi Day, you can find some info here, and here, and even here. Or you can Google for yourself!

Whatever your personal beliefs, I wish you all an enlightened Bodhi Day.

Dysfunction Defusion

The holiday season if fast approaching, and with it comes a lot of family stress for many folks. But your ol' pal, Remarkable Monkey, is here to help. I'm gonna share an amazing technique I've discovered that can instantly defuse most common family-dysfunction situations.

I stumbled upon this miraculous technique last Christmas at my in-laws. Now, don't get me wrong, I love my husband's family and they're really nice people. They're usually pleasant to be around and we generally have a good time. That being said, like a lot of families, tensions sometimes run high on holidays. Unreasonable expectations combined with crankiness, personal issues and family members pushing each others' buttons can bring things to the boiling point. That's just not fun for me, and I don't enjoy being around that, so I figured out a way to defuse it fast.

Here's the deal... Ya know how in every church choir and/or congregation, there's always one lady who fancies herself an opera singer? And ya know how that lady will sing in a very loud operatic style, badly? (You KNOW what I'm talking about!) Next time you're at a family holiday gathering and the bickering and button-pushing are reaching critical mass, just start singing carols at the top of your lungs, church-lady style. Your family will think you've lost your mind, but it's an instant tension releaser! Works like a charm, and is usually effective by just first or second line of whatever song you choose.

I just tried it again at my in-laws on Thanksgiving this year, and not only did it help keep everyone's mood light when folks started getting testy, my bro- and sis-in-law joined in a few times!

Remember... just sing those carols really loudly, and really badly in opera style. They'll probably laugh or start researching mental facilities for you. Either way, at least YOU'll have fun! Or maybe it's just me.

Seasonal Deliciousness Addendum...

I forgot to include this little item of food heaven in my previous post... Philadelphia Soft Cream Cheese in Pumpkin Spice flavor, another limited edition seasonal item. This stuff is awesome! Almost like pumpkin cheesecake in a tub! I've been spreading it on toasted whole grain Eggos and it makes them quite tasty, but I bet it would be FANTASTIC on graham crackers or even ginger snaps. Mmmmmm.... on ginger snaps..... ***drooooool!*** I'm gonna have to try that, I think.

Seasonal Deliciousness...

It's that time of year... the time when we get to enjoy tasty treats that, for some reason, we usually only get this time of year. You already know how I feel about Publix Pumpkin Pie ice cream (swoooon!). I know a lot of you look forward to the autumn return of Starbucks' Pumpkin Spice Latte. I had a taste of somebody's once, but wasn't crazy about it myself. I recently tried the Salted Caramel Mocha Latte (iced) though, and found it interesting enough that I'll probably eventually get another one.

Mr. Remarkable Monkey is quite fond of Chick-Fil-A's Peppermint Chocolate Chip shake. I'm not a big fan of the mint/chocolate combo in general, but he sure enjoys them! He's also been diggin' the Sam Adams Octoberfest beer.

The one thing that I REALLY wanted to try this year was Kellogg's Pumpkin Pie Pop Tarts. I gave up Pop Tarts years ago, except for special occasions like vacations or hurricane watches in our area, but the lure of a pumpkin pie flavored version intrigued me. As luck would have it, I didn't get around to shopping for them until last week, when apparently it was pretty much too late. I searched several Target stores and a couple WalMarts with no luck... all were sold out. I considered ordering them from Amazon, but figured nah... I'd just wait until next year. And then an angel that I work with, who knew of my fruitless search, acquired a box from a WalMart near her parents' house... they must live in a fairly remote area outside of town or something, because nobody else could find them. So this angel bestowed a family pack box of Pumpkin Pie flavored Pop Tart goodness on me. Mmmmm! They are delish! Being the Pop Tarts that they are, they're maybe just a little too sweet, but toast one up and it's almost like a single serving pastry pocket of pumpkin pie. At 200 calories each, I've so far managed to limit myself to having just one per day, for dessert. (I'm out of Publix Pumpkin Pie ice cream at the moment anyway.)

I guess I have thing for pumpkin-y deliciousness (aside from the Pumpkin Spice Lattes, which maybe I should give another whirl). I'm thinking I need to get myself over to The Fresh Market for a loaf of their moist, delicious pumpkin bread. I'm also planning to make pumpkin bars soon for the gang at work as a thanks for their support of my efforts in the Making Strides event. I'll also make some pumpkin dog cookies for my beloved Hobey and some of his pals.

And don't even get me started on Thanksgiving... I'm already drooling just thinking about next Thursday's dinner with turkey, mashed potatoes, sliced sauteed brussels sprouts. Mr. RM will insist on green bean casserole and sweet potato casserole, also tasty. And of course, I'll be having pumpkin pie!

What are some of YOUR favorite seasonal or holiday treats?

Monkey at the Movies: Moneyball

Mr. Remarkable Monkey and I finally got around to seeing "Moneyball" last week. It was pretty good. In case you don't know, it's based on the Oakland A's general manager Billy Beane (played by Brad Pitt) and his quest to find a way to field a winning MLB team for the 2002 season with one of the lowest payrolls in the league.

I'm not an avid baseball fan, so some of the references and info probably went over my head, but the film holds up and is interesting for even a casual fan like myself. It's also a very quiet movie... literally. There seemed to be several scenes with periods of complete silence. That's not a bad thing... it just struck me as unusual in this era of explosions and loud rockin' soundtracks. I don't remember the last time I was in a movie theater and noticed such stillness... like everyone was trying not to munch their popcorn or rattle their candy wrappers too loudly during those quiet scenes.

Anyway, the movie gives you and inside look at what it took to build that 2002 A's team, and what it took to turn their slow start into a winning season. It wasn't easy. Billy Beane and his assistant GM Peter Brand (played by Jonah Hill) were trying to do things much differently than other MLB teams. Brand had earned an economics degree from Yale, and had a completely different approach on how to draft players. Together, they implemented Brand's system, and though it didn't win them the World Series, it got them close. It also made an impression on other teams, which is evident in the film's closing scenes. (Think 2004 Red Sox.)

One thing in the movie that bothered me was Pitt's frequent use of "dip", and the accompanying spitting into cups, etc. I realize he was probably trying to be true to the real life Billy Beane, but I found it terribly distracting and totally unnecessary. If it had somehow been integral to the plot or the character, it may not have seemed so gratuitous. But it didn't really add anything, and I would hate for younger boys to think it's cool since Brad Pitt did it in that baseball movie.

Overall, it was definitely worth the price of a matinee. Not sure how much longer it will be in theaters, so catch it quick or check it out on dvd, pay-per-view, Netflix or however you prefer to watch movies at home.

Halloweener...

I wore this to work today since it's Halloween.

Them: "Hey Remarkable Monkey, nice halloween hat. What's the B stand for?"

Me: "I'm a witch with a capital B... duh."

Them: "How is that different from any other day?"

Me: "Today I'm wearing a hat."

Them: "Where's your broom?"

Me: "I shoved it up someone's ass for asking stupid questions and making snarky remarks."

(Previous conversation happened only in good fun.)

Happy Halloween!

Guess They've Never Seen a Pink Ribbon...

So... my funbags continue to provide me with hours of "entertainment". Get this... the benefits summary of my health insurance plan states that it covers "Preventive Mammography (within recognized standard guidelines)" at 100% with no deductible. And yet, they are denying coverage of the annual mammogram I had in July because it was a "diagnostic" mammogram and not a "screening" mammogram. WTF???? Seriously? Damn insurance company bastards!

Nowhere in any of the materials that I can find does it say diagnostic mammograms are not included. Any reasonable person would infer that one annual mammogram, regardless of how it's coded when billed, would be covered, right? Every annual mammogram I've had until now has always been covered as part of the 100% pre-deductible preventive care stuff, and they've been "diagnostic" for at least the past five or six years thanks to my dense breast tissue, cysts and family history. This is the first time I've run into this situation, and it stinks.

This is a new insurance company for me since my employer seems to change plans almost every year trying to save money. Fortunately, although I have $5,000 deductible, my employer generously covers a large percentage of it, so this mammogram will ultimately end up on their dime. But what about women who's employers don't help out with deductible costs? What happens when they go in for their annual mammogram, thinking it's covered under their preventive package, and then get stuck with a $400+ bill? If their budget is much tighter than mine, it would be difficult for them to come up with the funds to pay it. And it would probably lead to many women skipping this life-saving preventive tool! It's just not right, I tell ya. I won't mention this craptacular insurance company's name, but I will tell you that it rhymes with "oven tree".

The billing department at the facility where I had my mammogram done said they're seeing this situation more often. I did some quick Google research this afternoon, and learned that some companies do not make a distinction between "diagnostic" and "screening" mammograms... both are covered at 100% pre-deductible as part of their preventive packages. Kudos to those companies! That's the way it SHOULD be done. A mammogram is preventive regardless of whether it's diagnostic or simple screening, and it should be covered as part of any pre-deductible preventive package that includes mammography.

I've gotten nowhere arguing this point with my S.O.B. insurance company, but a customer service manager there DID suggest that I file a grievance/appeal, which I will do. I also contacted every local network media outlet today and suggested they look into this situation, since October and Breast Cancer Awareness Month is coming to a close in a week. I doubt any of them actually will, but I hope they do because I really think women need to be aware of it.

It's wrong, wrong WRONG! Well, I think so anyway. But maybe it's just me.

Ladies, don't let it keep you from getting your annual mammogram... most of you won't be getting the "diagnostic" version anyway, but just be aware of it. Check your benefits coverage, and work with your healthcare provider to try and avoid these *%&@# insurance issues. Take care of your boobies!

Pack 'Em Like Sardines...

I traveled by air recently, which is never much fun these days. All things considered, this trip wasn't too bad, with two flight legs each way. Aside from a slight delay from our point of origin (both going AND on our return trip), everything was pretty much on schedule. The planes on all four flights were packed though, and as we boarded each one, I had to wonder why the hell the airlines insist on boarding from front to back.

If you've flown recently, you know the drill... They begin the boarding process by allowing first class passengers and those who need assistance to board first. Then they call each "zone" one by one, starting with the front of the plane and working toward the back of the plane. This is what doesn't make sense, and I'll tell you why: Boarding front to back causes slow boarding and uncomfortable passengers.

Think about it... as passengers seated near the front get on the plane, they pause to put their carry-on luggage in the racks before sitting. Meanwhile, the passengers behind them are forced to stop and wait until they're done and sit down. So now you have people standing in the narrow aisle of the plane with their luggage, waiting for the aisle to clear so they can move along. As the plane slowly fills, the passengers already seated in the front are in peril of getting banged around by other boarding passengers as they struggle down the aisle toward the rear of the plane with their luggage.

Seems like it would be a whole lot easier and quicker to load the plane from back to front. Sure, go ahead and let your high-dollar first class fares on first if you want, but then board the rest of the lemmings back to front. Once the rearmost passengers from, say, Zone 5 are on board, Zone 4 passengers could board without having to wait for Zone 5 passengers to get their luggage into the bins and sit down. Then Zone 3 could board faster, etc. etc. Don't you think that would help prevent passengers from having to stand in the aisles waiting to get to their seat location?

I think it would be a better, more efficient, more comfortable way to do it. But maybe it's just me.

Treats for the Ta-Tas...

Pink Ribbon Pink Lemonade Bars

I'm well on my way to meeting my fundraising goal for the upcoming Making Strides Against Breast Cancer event, but I'm still a little short. So I recently made some lemon bars to take to work to try and coax some donations out of my coworkers. But in honor of the reason behind them, I decided to tint 'em pink. Then I had an idea to REALLY tie it all together with the purpose... I masked off part of the surface with ribbon cutouts before sprinkling the powdered sugar on top, and voila! Pink Ribbon Pink Lemonade Bars!

The extra effort was worth it. I think they turned out looking fabulous, if I do say so myself. And thanks to my generous co-workers, they got me $23 closer to my goal! Not too shabby.

I sent some pink tinted Rice Krispies treats to work with my husband this morning... here's hoping his coworkers are as generous as mine!

We're nearly halfway through October, which is breast cancer awareness month. Don't forget to schedule your annual mammogram and breast exam ladies, and be sure to support anyone you know who is fundraising for the cause this month if you can! Even small donations make a difference... they add up!